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Coping with a life crisis – First aid

I don’t know what to do next – first steps out of a life crisis

There are times when your own life suddenly feels chaotic and almost impossible to cope with. A break-up, the loss of a loved one, financial worries, family conflicts or a serious disappointment can upset your inner balance. Thoughts go round in circles, decisions are hard to make, and even everyday tasks become a burden. However, if you find yourself thinking, „I don’t know what to do next“, you don’t have to find a solution to the whole situation straight away. The first step out of a life crisis is often to pause and admit to yourself that you need support.

How can I tell if I’m going through a life crisis?

A life crisis does not manifest itself in the same way for everyone. Some people affected feel constantly exhausted, whilst others become irritable, anxious or withdraw from those around them. Sleep problems, difficulty concentrating and a feeling of inner emptiness may also occur.

A crisis often does not arise from a single event. Sometimes various sources of stress build up over a long period of time until a person’s own resources are no longer sufficient. This does not mean that a person is weak or has failed. Rather, it shows that the way they have dealt with challenges up to now is no longer sufficient at the moment.

Anyone who barely recognises themselves anymore or feels as though they are merely going through the motions should take these signs seriously. A life crisis is not a personal failure, but a situation in which new support and guidance are needed.

Take the pressure off for a moment

In difficult times, we often feel the urge to sort out all our problems as quickly as possible. Yet it is precisely this expectation that can create additional pressure. It is not necessary to know straight away what life will be like in a few months’ time.

It is more helpful to focus first on the next manageable step. Perhaps this involves getting up, having something to eat, going for a short walk or phoning someone you trust. Such small actions do not change the whole situation straight away, but they can help you regain a sense of stability.

Another Pastoral care helpline can be a first point of contact if there is no one available in your immediate circle or if you are struggling to find the right words. You don’t need to be able to explain your situation in full. A simple sentence such as „I don’t know what to do and I need someone to talk to“ is enough to start a conversation.

Why does talking about the crisis help?

Worrisome thoughts often seem more overwhelming when they remain solely in one’s own mind. Talking about them allows them to be voiced, sorted through and viewed from a different perspective. The person you’re talking to doesn’t have to offer a ready-made solution straight away.

Often, the very fact that someone is listening attentively and taking your distress seriously is enough to provide some relief. A Pastoral care hotline provides a safe space where even difficult emotions such as fear, shame, anger or despair can be expressed.

Anyone who does not feel able to attend a face-to-face meeting can Telephone counselling make use of. Contact by telephone can make it easier to get started, as the conversation can take place in a familiar setting. You decide for yourself how much you want to share and which topics to focus on initially.

Breaking everyday life down into small steps

During a crisis in your life, even simple tasks can seem overwhelming. That is why it can be helpful not to view the day as a whole, but to break it down into smaller sections.

Instead of setting out to sort out all outstanding issues, you can start by choosing just one task. This could be preparing a meal, having a shower, popping out for a quick shop, or replying to an important message. After that, you can take a break.

Fixed bedtimes, regular meals and light exercise can also help to stabilise you. Whilst these measures do not resolve the root cause of the crisis, they do provide a certain structure for your body and mind. It is important to adjust your expectations temporarily. During a stressful period, it is enough just to get through the next day – or even just the next few hours.

Can faith provide a source of strength during a life crisis?

A crisis can shake not only our confidence in life, but also our faith. Questions such as „Why does God allow this to happen?“ or „Why am I not getting an answer?“ are understandable in difficult times. Such doubts need not be suppressed.

Faith does not mean that pain or uncertainty disappear immediately. However, it can strengthen the hope that one’s current situation need not be the final word. A prayer can be very simple. It does not need to be worded in any particular way. Lament, anger and speechlessness, too, have their place before God.

One Faith & life counselling can help people to explore personal struggles and questions of faith together. The aim is not to provide quick religious answers. Rather, it creates a space where doubt, hope and the search for the next step can coexist.

When is it important to seek professional support?

Not every life crisis can be overcome solely or exclusively through pastoral counselling. If severe anxiety, persistent insomnia, deep feelings of hopelessness or other mental health issues persist over a prolonged period, additional medical or psychotherapeutic help should be sought.

If there is an immediate danger to yourself or others, prompt assistance is required. In an acute emergency, you should dial the emergency number. Pastoral care can provide support and relief, but it is no substitute for medical or psychotherapeutic treatment.

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